As an educator and lifelong learner, I’ve come to appreciate how powerful a slight shift in mindset can be. I spent years telling myself I couldn’t learn certain skills, like biking or swimming. This “I can’t” narrative became so ingrained that I avoided even trying. But one day, I decided to challenge this belief. With persistence, I learned to swim in just four days and to bike in two—it was truly all about shifting my mindset.
This experience taught me that how we think about our abilities directly impacts our willingness to try new things. As parents, modeling this kind of growth mindset can help our kids develop resilience and a love for learning. The best part? Even small, consistent changes at home, like using encouraging language and reframing mistakes as learning opportunities, can impact how children see their abilities. This article will guide you through simple, everyday ways to model a growth mindset for your kids, laying a strong foundation for them to see challenges as stepping stones toward growth.
Why Modeling a Growth Mindset Matters
When I went biking with my niece and nephews, they watched me struggle, fall, and keep going until I improved. This experience showed them that it’s okay to struggle and that persistence leads to progress. By embracing mistakes as learning steps, parents help children adopt a growth mindset, fostering their willingness to try, fail, and try again. When kids see these qualities firsthand, they approach their challenges with confidence and resilience.

The Science Behind a Growth Mindset
Brain plasticity, or neuroplasticity, is the brain’s ability to reorganize and form new neural connections throughout life, especially in response to learning and experience. Research in cognitive neuroscience shows that when we practice new skills, the brain strengthens these connections, turning once-difficult tasks into more manageable ones. For children, this concept reinforces the idea that abilities can grow with effort. Understanding that their brains are adaptable can motivate kids to tackle challenges confidently. For additional insight into the science behind growth mindset and brain adaptability, see this growth mindset overview on Carol Dweck’s research.
Practical Tips for Parents to Encourage a Growth Mindset at Home
- Embrace Challenges Together: Show your child that challenges are opportunities to grow. When I learned to ride a bike with my niece and nephews, they saw me struggle and fail. But I kept trying, demonstrating persistence. By tackling something difficult, even in front of them, I showed them that facing obstacles is okay. Kids internalize these lessons by watching us navigate challenges with perseverance and optimism.
- Praise Effort, Not Just Results: Instead of praising innate talent, focus on the effort and strategies used to overcome difficulties. For instance, tell your child, “You worked so hard on that puzzle!” This reinforces that abilities can improve with effort, not intelligence or talent. Studies, including Carol Dweck’s research, show that when children are praised for effort rather than innate ability, they are more likely to develop a growth mindset (Dweck, 2006).
- Normalize Mistakes as Learning Opportunities: Emphasize that mistakes are a natural part of the learning process. Share your errors and what you learned from them. For example, you could say, “I made a mistake while biking today, but it helped me learn what I need to do better next time.” This reinforces that growth comes through effort and overcoming setbacks. Research in neuroscience shows that the brain strengthens with practice, especially when we view challenges as learning opportunities.
- Use Growth-Oriented Language: Replace fixed-mindset language like “I’m bad at this” with growth-oriented phrases such as “I’m still learning” or “I haven’t mastered it yet.” The language you use shapes how your child views their learning process. According to cognitive neuroscience principles, parents use this type of language to support the brain’s ability to adapt and strengthen through effort.
- Set Achievable Learning Goals: Help your child set small, incremental goals to show them how progress is made over time. Celebrate their growth by reviewing where they started and where they are now. This could be as simple as practicing a math skill or working through a creative project. Just as athletes set goals to improve performance, setting learning targets provides clear, actionable steps toward improvement, reinforcing that skills grow with consistent effort.
By making these simple changes in how you approach challenges, you help your child internalize a growth mindset, enabling them to view struggles as opportunities for growth and development.
Small Changes, Lasting Impact
You don’t need to make drastic changes to see results. Small, consistent actions like praising effort or reframing mistakes as learning moments can make a big difference in fostering a growth mindset. The key is persistence and the belief that each step is part of the learning process, no matter how small.
Making small shifts in my mindset, like believing I could bike and swim, opened up new possibilities and gave me the confidence to tackle challenges like running my first marathon. It’s a reminder that growth happens incrementally, and by nurturing this mindset, you’re giving your child the tools to embrace learning and resilience throughout their lives.
Start with one change, celebrate the progress, and watch your child’s confidence to face challenges grow.
